15 office gadgets which are as useless as a chocolate teapot

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Staplers. Yes, they’re pretty useful. Except when they don’t work, or someone *cough* Dave *cough* has mistakenly put it back in the wrong place.

They thought the idea of Post-Its wouldn’t stick – but they did. Turns out they were adhesive enough. But some overzealous inventors have gone that one step too far and come up with the plain ridiculous – gadgets that are so useless their intended functionality has made their existence completely and utterly redundant. Here are a few items, which, if I were you, I’d throw in the drawer. Or just not buy in the first place.

1. Non-conventional shaped Post-It Notes

From their beginnings as yellow sticky memo pads, Post-it notes have evolved and now come in all shapes and sizes. From classic Post-its to thumbs up (or down) Post-its, some are useful, some not so much. Avoid Tetris-shaped post it notes if looking for practicality.

Post-It: Because you’re worth it

2. Electric paper aeroplane launcher

So you’ve mastered the art of paper aeroplane making, but you just can’t figure out how to make it fly? Never fear, the electric paper aeroplane launcher is here to save the day.

3. Paper Emails

Paper emails, marketed as ‘emails for people without an email address’ are a step above a simple note. Or are they? Very few people, if anyone, can survive working in an office without an email account.

Yes, I really wasn’t joking

4. A USB cup warmer

Wouldn’t it be easier just to make another cup of tea? Or pop it in the office microwave?

 

5. A USB cup cooler

Then there’s the USB cup cooler. Get a fresh can from the fridge. If it’s been sitting for long enough to be room temperature, it’s probably gone flat anyway. Splash out on a new can.

First world problems?

6. USB retro phone handsets

All of the hard work that went into developing headsets and hands-free devices can now be thrown away and you can pretend to be on an original telephone while still receiving calls via your computer.

Technology takes a step back

7. BIC for Her

BIC for her – ‘a ball pen essentially for women’. I’m not entirely sure how masculine your existing ball point pens are in your office, but try to avoid any sexual discrimination in the work place.

Because all women love pink!

8. 360 Degree Pen

The 360 degree pen that has a hoop at the opposite end to the tip. Now you can swing your pen around on one finger.

That’s not at all annoying in meetings

9. Giant Paperclips

Paperclips serve their purpose – and then there are giant paperclips to hold the extra load of paperwork. However the largest paperclip, for general sale, is 11 ½ inches long. I think the creators were looking for a ring binder.

This is actually a giant paperclip, you’ve just lost all sense of proportion

10. ‘Any Key’

Has your computer ever told you to press ‘any key’ to continue? Well now you can buy the ‘any key’ and attach it to your keyboard.

What is wrong with the world?

11. Mini Desk Vacuum

A mini desk vacuum might seem like a great idea to keep your desk tidy but emptying it is more hassle than simply wiping up your crumbs after a quick snack at your desk.

12. Mini staplers

Buy a full-sized stapler to avoid having to refill the dispenser every few minutes.

 

13. Mini hole punch

Buy a hole punch that punches all of the holes you need at the same time.

Surely you know what a mini hole punch looks like?

14. Mini anything

Please buy actual sized office equipment. It is often a specified size for a reason.

Mini office stationery should only be reserved for these employees

15. Nappak portable sleeping cubicle

This inflatable cubicle can be set up anywhere that has enough space for a bed. By all means make you staff comfortable but where does it stop? One cheeky employee will take it too far and the sleeping pod will never be used again.

There’ll always be one who takes advantage of the Nappak

 

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  • Kevin

    Haha, that’s brilliant. The ‘any key’ is my favorite for being so utterly useless!